Category: on my mind

I don’t know why I can’t seem to write anything coherent anymore. These days seem so busy and I’m so sore and tired. I kind of feel as if I lost some spark and am desperately trying to grasp at something beyond my reach and comprehension.

• I caved and bought a Kindle, although now I don’t remember why I wanted to buy one. I could definitely spend less of my life staring at backlit screens, but I also have a giant stack of books here that I haven’t gone through reading. I think I bought it because they’re giving a $25 gift certificate with it, which will probably going towards a cover for it. Although if it’s able to display pdf files, maybe it would be useful to transfer a bunch of old notes and stuff and have that around.
• Started reading The Unbearable Lightness of Being and was suddenly struck by how much common knowledge we seem to all share. Despite the fact that I think people are all kind of dumb and we as a whole seem to know so little, it’s amazing how many things we know that other people also know. For example, in 2 pages of TULB, we have mentions of Robespierre and the French Revolution, Hitler, Jesus, Nietzsche, and Parmenides. And like anyone who’s reading the book probably knows what the hell is going on. On the other hand, why do we bother memorizing all this crap?
• Probably going to feel a little sad after next weekend and there are no rehearsals to suck up all my Saturdays. I really should practice more. On the plus side, Beauty was already back in rehearsal, which either means she heals really fast or she’s crazy.
• Got some padding for the big toe today. Hopefully that will help a little. Also, probably going to try out a pair of GMs despite the amount of flak they seem to get.
• The temperature here has been a bit unsettling. Why is it all sunny and 80 during the week and cloudy during the weekend? Not that I really have time or energy to do anything outdoors.
• I kind of just want to take a really long nap. It’s good that it’s almost bedtime.

• Well, I think the dehumidifier is working, because my skin is all dry and itchy. Reminds me of winter in San Diego.
• Hurray for misquoting MLK (link). I don’t think the celebratory responses were entirely in good taste, but I can understand the sentiment.
• It’s been one of those days that didn’t seem so bad, like maybe it’ll make me think that things aren’t going downhill all the time, like maybe the second derivative of my life is positive.
• My eyes have been pretty tired lately, though. Staring at a computer screen for 14 hours a day is probably not very good for the eyes. I ordered a pair of computer reading glasses from the optometrist, which supposedly will be easier on the eyes. We’ll see how those go.
• Very sore from class. Basically, my entire body aches these days. I think trying to add this weightlifting regime on top of classes is going to destroy me. Still no info on Beauty’s ankle injury.

 

Euphoria ended rather abruptly mid last week, and now I’m mired in a deep lethargic morass. I don’t think I’m sick, but maybe I am. It’s bad when I’m burned out from working by the end of Monday. This is after averaging 12 hours of sleep over the weekend. I’ve lost all energy, and even my ballet motivation’s been sapped by “Beauty” injuring her ankle; trepidation for starting pointe also creeping in. Projects just keeps piling up at work. Even my reading list is getting out of control. At least I managed to finish Annotated Alice, which was pretty interesting. I can’t recall if I’ve ever read Through the Looking Glass before. My memory kind of sucks.

Goal for the week: survive and don’t lose it.

P.S. I bought a couple of dehumidifiers. I hope they work. Although it’s almost summer, so maybe we’ll just open windows instead.